Hi, JereMaya. It's daddy. Today is March 21st, 2022. And for our 11th episode, I'd like to talk about the art of persuasion. The main reason I bring this up now is because we celebrated Momo's first birthday last week. And if there ever is a success story about persuasion, It is about convincing your mom to allow us to raise a family cat.

The story of Momo joining our family begins over 15 years ago. When your mom was 100% against the idea of ever allowing a cat inside our home.

So this particular episode will be most favored by two audiences. First, those who want to gain better insights on how to persuade a reluctant person and second fellow cat lovers. Before I dive into the story though. It's worth defining what persuasion is. Persuasion is the act of convincing someone to change their beliefs or do something you suggest.

And it's a skill that can be used in many different ways. It can help you get what you want from others, whether it's convincing your parents to let you stay up late. Or trying to change someone's mind about something, which is what today's story is all about. Something to note. No matter how good a persuader you become. There will always be times when persuasion does not work. Sometimes the other person will be too stubborn or convinced you are wrong. No matter what evidence or arguments you present them with.

And depending on the severity of the situation, these rejections may have to be something you have to be open to and be willing to walk away from.

So let's get to this 15 year journey. When I first proposed to your mom. I knew she wasn't crazy about cats since she had a college roommate whose cat did a good job of terrorizing her, chewing up her flip flops, having a really smelly kitty litter box. And making her jump and scream whenever the cat wanted to ambush her for fun.

But when we were dating, she had the wonderful opportunity to meet my three childhood cats before they passed on. And she did great with them. So when we did get married, I casually brought the idea that it'd be wonderful to have a cat in our house. She slowly turned to me. And said no. This moment reminded me of that famous scene in Lord of the rings. When Elrond the elf screams at the human king, Isildur. To cast the evil ring in the fire of Mount doom and destroy it. And then Isildur has that smile and replies, "No." While I don't think your mom had the same evil smile with that response, I'd like to think Elrond and I felt the same way. Our hopes and dreams of having peace or in my case, a cute kitten, shattered that day. It was truly sad.

But that is where the art of persuasion comes into play. There are many different techniques for persuading others. Some people try to appeal to the other person's emotions while others focus on logic and facts. The point is it often helps if you understand what the other person wants or cares about.

You may also need to adjust your approach depending on who you're talking to. Some people prefer direct approaches. While others, like your mom, prefer more subtle methods.

So for your mom, I have three methods that ultimately worked.

First. Listen and understand where the opposition is coming from. You need to pinpoint, where is the resistance? If you can address those concerns, then one. You can understand why the person is reluctant and two, hopefully you can provide reassurances or alternatives that resolve these concerns. With your mom. I thought her flat out refusal was solely because of her college roommate's cat. So I focused on how that cat was unique and not like the cat we would raise in our home. And when I discovered that my wife's entire family is anti pets, I knew the resistance was much more complicated than I thought.

And by the way I found your mom's family's last name, mew, spelled M E w a very misleading, if not false advertising of being cat friendly. So the best solution with these Mews was that I found a job out of state and we moved far away from my in-laws. Then we got the cat. I'm totally kidding, but I knew things didn't look good. After all, I was outnumbered by people who fear or despise cats.

The second method is, do your research, whatever issues your mom has with cats. There had to be a solution or clarification or simply education. Why cats can be amazing pets. While I wouldn't Bible thump or forcefeed, this useful information, I would casually bring up a fun fact or show her a random video every so often so she can get a different perspective. I shared with her several well-known reasons, but the five that really stood out to your mom was one. Teaching our kids, empathy and respect for animals. And it's no secret in our society that cats make great companions. They offer an unconditional love that can be equal to, or sometimes even greater than many human friends and confidants. I know dogs can do this too, but for this episode, I'm just talking about cats.

The second benefit is teaching our kids responsibility and duties and what it means to take care of someone who can't take care of themselves. That includes feeding kitty litter duty. And simply playing with your cat and building a strong bond. I also promised your mom that you Jeremy and Maya and me, would do all these things and your mom wouldn't have to do any of these duties.

The third benefit your mom really liked was that cats keep our house pest free. You probably already know that cats like to hunt rodents. But they're also natural insect killers. Many cats enjoy hunting down bugs, such as house flies and spiders. And it's awesome since I'm not a fan of bugs in the house. The fourth benefit that caught your mom's eye was that cats are low maintenance and costs significantly less than dogs who need walking, training, frequent grooming, and more toys and attention. The fifth and final benefit your mom's seriously considered in having a cat is making her husband happier than ever. I'm half joking there.

After 15 years of marriage, I've said many times that your mom. And you twins make me so happy. In you three, I've got everything I need. But she also took serious note that adding an additional furry person to our lives could possibly make us all happier.

So only listening to what your mom cares about. And following up with research on those needs, I was able to demonstrate that the benefits may actually outweigh the costs. Or at least mitigate her concerns about raising a cat. Still even with a long list of benefits, owning a cat. I knew my voice alone was not enough.

Which leads me to the third method. Seek and partner with credible influential allies. It wasn't until four to five years ago did I make this move. After all the credible influential allies I sought out were two small children.

Who had direct constant access to your mom. Yes. I'm talking about you, Jeremy, and Maya. There are many things I love that I want to share with you, our faith and beliefs in God. Awesome. Classic movies, books from my childhood. The list goes on. But 10 years since I married your mom and was bluntly rejected about owning a cat, I calculated and waited for this wonderful opportunity to brainwash. I mean,

Teach you both the wonders and joys of cats. I introduced you to books like Harry Potter movies with strong lovable cat characters, like Shrek with puss in boots. I would show you cat videos on a daily basis. And even take you to cat cafes. So you get the exposure to petting a cat, interacting with a cat.

And when you were finally indoctrinated, I mean, when you saw the light and how awesome cats are it didn't take much for you two, to ask mommy on multiple occasions on a daily basis. If we can get a cat.

And one day. It was either January or February, 2021, 15 years. Since that terrible day of realizing your mom, didn't like cats. Did your mom at a family dinner? Said something that made all our jaws drop. She said, "I can see by your 10th birthday. We can maybe get a cat."

I remember there was. 10 seconds of silence when we first heard her say that. then there were cheers and high fives. And just this sense of hope. And well, the rest is history. In April, 2021, we adopted Momo when he was only six weeks old. And as of March 17th, 2022. Momo is now a year old. And he has a radically transformed our lives. Not only did all the benefits I mentioned become true.

He has surprised us with things we didn't know. Cats can do. Like going on a leash with morning walks around the neighborhood. And with these daily walks, we have meaningful conversations with our neighbors. Who are often walking their dogs. Momo loves to meet new friends. And he has really brought our community closer together.

And your mom out of anyone else I know has changed the most. In mere months after welcoming, Momo into our home. You can hear her singing his name. Playing with him. Inviting him to sleep on her lap or at the end of our bed throughout the nights. She has become the cat lady. I always wanted it to be married to. Sure this story took over 15 years to have a happy ending, but the wait was well worth it.

So there you go, JereMaya. To recap. There are three methods I think worked really well. They revolve around listening and understanding the person's reluctance to do what you want them to do; doing your research and sharing the guidance and suggestions to address their concerns; and finally seek and partner with people who could be a great influence. And if there's a key takeaway from all this aside from the fact that cats are worth raising is that these three methods of persuasion has many use cases.

The same exercise, applies to getting a job. You need to know what your future employer wants in a specific role. And you need to do the necessary research and practice to see if you have the skills, experience and expertise to address this employer's needs. And finally, you need to have mentors, friends, partners, and allies to be amazing business references so that your hiring manager is confident that who you say you are and what you can provide are validated by credible people that know you very well. My final key takeaway is that when all else fails, Patience and persistence are the keys to any kind of persuasion. And like all the best things and people in life. They are worth pursuing and waiting for.

I have many more stories with that key takeaway, but for now I'm just so happy that Momo is with us today. Love you.